Fireworks: A Series of Invader Zim One Shots
by Firefly Fairy In A Bottle
Summary: To have no rumor, you would have to be invisible. No one is safe. Primary pairings are ZaDr, GaGr, and RaPr. Suggestions welcome!
1. Fireworks: Slight ZaDR

**AN– Alrighty. So... this is my place for Invader Zim one-shots! I'm having a little IZ streak so expect quite a bit from me! There will most likely be some ZaDr, since that's what I ship. Also some GaGr and maybe some RaPr. I'm completely open to suggestions, though! Anyways, on with the story!**

**Title- Fireworks**

**Genre- Humor**

**Summary- Dib tries to explain fireworks to Zim. Chaos ensues.**

**Words- 173**

**Inspiration- A picture of fireworks in Sydney.**

**Notes- This was a prompt for my writer's group. When I read it out loud, everyone was laughing so hard.**

"Ahh!" Zim shrieked suddenly. "The stars are exploding!"

Dib sighed, half in exasperation and half in amusement. "Those aren't stars. They're fireworks."

"Fire. . . Works?" Zim said slowly, attempting to comprehend what he had just heard.

Dib looked up at the sky, struggling to come up with an explanation that his green-faced enemy– wait, no. . . _friend_– would understand. "They're explosions made from gunpowder. . . they're used for celebrations."

Zim stared at the most recent burst of pink and purple in horror.

". . . They're supposed to be pretty."

"Ah, yes!" Zim cried out. "And Zim find them _very_ pretty, yes!" Zim raisedhis voice, addressing the normal, never-seen-an-undisguised-alien-before humans. "You hear that, worm-babies? Zim is _normal_, I tell you– oh so very _normal_!"

Dib took Zim by his gloved hand, dragging him away from the scene as the Irken continued to face turning red from embarrassment, he muttered a simple lie. "I hate you."

* * *

Meanwhile, GIR gets arrested for use of illegal fireworks.


	2. Ends and Begins: GaGR and hinted ZaDR

**Title- Ends and Begins**

**Genre- Tragedy**

**Summary- For every ending, there is a beginning. GaGr, ZaDr. Character death.**

**Words- 391**

**Inspiration- I have no idea. I guess I just wanted to kill someone off.**

**Notes- This is really sad. I am so sorry. Oh, and Zim's blood is blue in my headcanon, so his blush is blue, too.**

A loud buzzing overtook the room as metal arms and legs clanked against each other. A high-pitched squeal was heard,but it was nothing like the joyful one Zim had been greeted with so many months before. No, this squeal was of pain.

"GIR! Listen to your master!" Zim managed to shout over the buzzing and assorted noises. "Y-you will stop that _this instant_!"

The sounds merely grew louder, and the robot began to glow as the newly-installed computer muttered an ominous, "Self-destruct will commence in ten. . ."

"_GIR!_" Zim wailed. "Don't you _dare_ leave me!"

"Nine. . ."

Three pairs of eyes all stared in horror as GIR let out another sharp cry of pain.

"Eight. . . Seven. . ."

"Zim, get back!" Dib cried out, rushing towardsthe alien.

"Six. . . Five. . ."

He pulled Zim to the furthest end of the lab, gasping for breath as he joined his sister.

"Four. . . Three. . .**"**

Gaz failed to hold back a whimper as unwanted tears fell from her eyes. "You stupid robot! _Fight it!_"

"Yes, GIR!" Zim shrieked. "Listen to the human girl!"

"Two. . . One. . ."

GIR opened his turquoise eyes, and for a mere moment his once-cheerful smile now captivated the room.

"I'm sorry, master. . ."

* * *

That was how it ended. . . This is how it began.

"GIR," Zim had started simply, trudging across the room. "I've noticed a malfunction in your programming."

GIR danced around the room with ease, stepping on keyboards and machinery with every step.

"GIR, stop that!"

Dib sighed from his seat on the other side of the room. "Zim, just because your pet robot kissed my sister, it doesn't mean–"

"_Silence!_ You know nothing! SIR units are not supposed to _love_! It's against their programming!"

"Oh, yeah?" Dib retorted with a smirk. "Then I guess _Irkens_ aren't supposed to love either."

Zim muttered something, his face flushing a bright blue.

Suddenly, a loud _click_ was heard from the other side of the lab, and GIR moaned in pain.

"GIR?" Gaz asked half-heartedly, though her concern could be heard if one were to listen very, _very_ closely. Very closely. "What's wrong with him?"

Zim stared in horror at his loyal companion as the room began to shake. "He pressed the self-destruct button."

Dib turned to him shakily. "For the house?"

"No. . . for him."


	3. Zim Buys Booty Shorts: Mild ZaDR

**Title- Zim Buys Booty Shorts**

**Genre- Humor**

**Summary- Zim's outfit was **_**ruined**_**. Solution? Go to the mall. Might be a crack-fic. Mild ZaDr.**

**Words- 827**

**Inspiration- All my brother's idea. I don't know where the Dib and Gaz subplot came from.**

**Notes- This is pretty much my brother's brainchild. He pushed me to write this and so I did. Thank you, Jaden! This takes place during their first year of middle skool– seventh grade.**

Gaz looked up from her Game Slave. "You've been acting really weird, Dib." It was merely a statement, lacking any concern, just what was expected of Gaz.

"Don't I always?" Dib answered with only a hint of sarcasm.

"Of course. But you've been acting _extra_ weird lately."

Dib clutched the book he held tightly. _What's Out There,_ the front cover read. "What makes you say that?"

Gaz shrugged. Assorted sounds escaped her Game Slave, which she never took her squinted eye off of. "I dunno. You're acting all nervous and stuff."

Dib's face flushed. "I am?"

Gaz glanced up form her Game Slave once more, one eye opening in subtle surprise. "It's a girl, isn't it?" she asked with limited interest.

"What? N-no–"

"It's _obvious_, Dib. Now tell me who it is so I can hold it over your head forever."

"No way, Gaz, I am not–"

Gaz sat up suddenly, the sounds of her video game coming to a shocking halt. "Here's the deal," she started in a serious tone. "If I can figure out who you like by the end of the week, you owe me _three_ pizzas."

"Fine," Dib replied stubbornly. "And if you can't, you have to help be with my paranormal studies for the next month. . . . And I mean actually _be_ helpful."

Gaz growled. Pizza was on the line here.

Oh, it was _on_.

* * *

"Alright. . . This one?" Zim held up a pair of magenta skinny jeans, to which GIR shook his head.

"Nah, I like this one!" GIR proudly showed his master a pink plaid skirt, not unlike the one worn by the neighboring private skool girls. Zim scowled.

"GIR! I can't wear _that_! Those are for human _females_!"

GIR pouted, looking down at the floor for comfort. Suddenly, his face lit up again. "Can I try 'em on?"

"No, GIR."

"Aww. . ."

It was disastrous. Zim was wearing grey pants. _Grey pants._ GIR, being GIR, had mixed the lights in with the darks, and everything had come out of the washing machine an awful, muddy grey. Zim's outfit was simply _ruined_, and the only way to fix it was. . .

Shopping. So here they were, situated in the smelly human mall. In a clothing store. In the young men's section. . . . So wait a minute, how on _Irk_ did GIR get that skirt?

. . . Don't ask. But _honestly_, Zim shouldn't have brought GIR to the mall in the first place. The little SIR unit was only bound to cause trouble. . . . Oh, right, so _that's_ why Zim hadn't left him home alone. . .

Zim glanced to the side as GIR pulled out a fluffy tutu, and in doing so caught a glimpse of a pair of tiny black shorts.

_Bingo._

Zim rushed towards the rack, yanking the shorts off of the hanger and nearly ripping them in the process. "This one!" he cried, raising the shorts above his head. "Zim will try on _this one_!"

* * *

"Alright, GIR. How does Master look?" Zim asked as he stepped out of the dressing room. The shorts fit perfectly. They were only a few inches in length, but the skool honestly didn't enforce the dress code, so Zim was surely in the clear. They wrapped around his figure perfectly, bringing out his Irken hips. Zim would have to be the first to admit that his figure had grown to be a bit. . . girlish, and yet these shorts seemed to both highlight _and_ tone down these features! They were perfect, and the more Zim stared at himself in the mirror, the more he was sure of this fact.

GIR squealed in approval.

"That settles it, then," Zim announced loudly. "_Zim will buy the shorts!_"

* * *

"_You!_" Zim shrieked as he appeared at the check-out counter. "Zim _demands_ purchase of these shorts!" He slammed the sort down on the counter, grinning smugly. He was obviously very satisfied with himself.

Besides a strange look from the woman working the check-out, things went smoothly for Zim, and he got his booty shorts.

* * *

"_Zim_ has arrived!" The shout echoed through out the classroom, bouncing off of the walls as the green-skinned teen took his first few steps into the room.

A hushed silence quickly fell over the room. After what felt like _forever_, Zita spoke.

"Zim, what are you _wearing_?" It wasn't mocking or disgusted, just _shocked_.

"I just thought it was time for a change, that is all," Zim simply stated, taking his seat in front of her. (After two years he still sits in front of her. . .)

From the other side of the room, Dib stared, his eyes as wide as his large head could fit. His face was a cherry red, and it stayed that way through out the skool day as he continued to sneak nervous glances at the alien "space boy".

. . . Needless to say, Gaz got her pizzas.


	4. You Belong With Me: ZaDR

**Title- You Belong With Me**

**Genre- Romance**

**Summary- Zim's been dating Gaz for three months now, and Dib's finally worked up the courage to say something about it. ZaDr**

**Words- 842**

**Inspiration- Another writing prompt. Had to begin a story with a song lyric. I chose "You Belong With Me", because of my Taylor Swift obsession.**

**Notes- I thought this would turn out to be OOC and craptastic. . . but I think it's actually pretty good.**

Dib scowled as he stared up at the spaceship. But it wasn't the usual feral scowl he wore around Zim. This one was more. . . thoughtful. "Have you ever thought. . . just _maybe_. . . ," he paused, debating on how to word his next statement, ". . . you belong with me?"

Zim snorted in amusement. "Zim? Belong with a _human_?" He frowned. "Unlikely."

"You're dating my sister."

"That does not mean I _belong_ with her."

"Exactly!" Dib cried out in agony. "Because you _don't_!"

Zim's voot cruiser lowered to the ground, and the top opened as Zim hopped out and came to face the human. "What are you trying to say, Dib?"

"W-well. . . ," Dib mumbled carefully, "I-I guess– did you just call me Dib?"

Zim's magenta eyes gave a few blinks. "Um. . . yes? That _is_ your name, isn't it, stink boy?"

"Well, yeah, it _is_, but I always figured you thought it was 'Earth Dirt', or 'Meat Bag', or 'Worm Baby', or—"

"Alright! Zim has heard _enough_!" Zims scowled as he stared ahead at his supposed worst enemy. "Just get on with the point. And make it _quick_."

Zim bit his lip as he stared not at Zim's magenta eyes, but at his lime-green forehead instead. Part of him prayed Zim couldn't tell the difference. "Zim. . . I don't know how to say this. . ."

Zim turned suddenly, taking a few distasteful steps back to his voot cruiser. "I don't have time for this. I'll see you at skool."

"Why can't you see it?" were the words shouted out in absolute exasperation. "_I_ understand you! Gaz doesn't, and she never will! Hell, she doesn't even _care_ about you!" Dib shut his eyes tightly as his voice rose in volume. "I've always been here with you, enemies or not! Is the Irken race naturally so _blind_?" He slowed down, emphasizing each word with a short-lived gasp of breath. "You. Belong. With. Me." He opened his eyes at last, only to find that Zim still had his back turned to him. ". . . Don't you get it?"

Zim's shoulders stiffened slightly, and he slowly turned himself to face the teenage boy. His whole face seemed to be stained bright blue. "What do you mean, human?"

Dib stopped short. What _did_ he mean by all of that? He gripped the dark fabric of his trench coat. "I. . . I guess I mean. . . I don't hate you, Zim."

Zim just stared at him, magenta eyes the size of saucers. "Zim. . . I-I-I mean, _I_ don't hate you either, Dib-Stink. . ." He scowled as he looked up at the taller boy. "I used to, of course, but that. . . ," he paused warily, "that was a long time ago." He directed his attention back to the ground. "Your sister. . . I am not attracted to her in the least bit. But the humans. . . They date, they fall into love. . . I need to seem normal to the Earthlings, of course."

Dib tilted his head, eying the Irken oddly. "Does Gaz know about this?"

Zim shrugs. "Probably. She's rather observant."

Zim was right, and Dib bit his lip while thinking of _other things_ his little sister may have noticed. "Well. . . ," Dib said as he regained his composure. "I'm gonna go home now. . ." The situation had gotten awkward fast, and Dib couldn't stand to stay another minute.

"Wait! Do not leave!" A gloved hand found it's way around Dib's wrist, and Dib screeched to a halt.

He turned back, mustering a feigned glare at Zim. "What is it now?"

"There _is_ someone Zim is attracted to. . . and it's not your sister. . ."

Dib was almost shaking with anticipation. Logically, Zim shouldn't have been telling his enemy about his secret crush. _Unless. . ._ "Who is it?" Dib asked on instinct, every inch of his body aching to know the answer.

"It's pathetic, really. To think– a mighty Irken invader such as myself having warm, fuzzing feelings for a pitiful _huma_–"

"I don't care! Just _tell me_!"

Within seconds Zim had yanked Dib down to his level and swiftly crushed their lips together before pushing him away. He backed away towards his voot cruiser, staring sternly at his boots to hide a furiously growing blush. "We tell no one about this, Dib." He took a final step back. "No. One. Not GIR, not your sister. _No one._"

Dib nodded quickly and silently.

Zim finally looked up at the human and smiled. And this time it wasn't one of his maniac grins. No, this time it was a true, genuine, rare smile. "And by the way. . . thank you."

"For what?" asked Dib, breathless.

"For helping Zim realize the truth." He climbed back into his voot cruiser, preparing for takeoff. "I belong with you."

And without another single word the voot cruiser took off into the sky, leaving Dib to stare off into space.

. . . This time, _he_ had won the game. Not Gaz. Him.

Only him. . .


	5. Mortos Der TITLE: ZaDR

**Title- Mortos Der [TITLE]**

**Genre- Romance**

**Summary- Zim was never one to ask questions. ZaDr.**

**Words- 1,095**

**Inspiration- Oh, c'mon. This idea has already been done plenty of times.**

**Notes- I drew a picture, and instantly thought, "I wanna make a story out of this!" I should probably do that with all of my other ZaDr pictures. ****This story was originally called "Soul Stealer," but then I thought of that, and. . . ****XD**

Zim clutched the side of the tree, successfully breaking off a large piece of pathetic Earth tree bark. He turned it over in his hands before snapping it in half, frustrated.

What _were_ those filthy humans _doing_? It was two humans– a boy and a girl. They were standing there, a few yards away form the tree, lips pressed together. Zim tossed the bark over his shoulder as he thought. Were they poisoning each other? Surely one of them would drop dead at any moment!

But no one dropped dead. How disappointing.

Possibilities zipped through Zim's head as he ogled the pair. They were eating each other's faces. One was possessing the other. They were sucking each other's souls out!

But nothing bad happened to either human. They just continued their strange ritual before pulling apart, both of them lightly panting.

Zim turned away from them, resting his back against the tree as he slid to the ground. What did it mean? He had seen nothing like it on Irk. . . Curse Earth and its _stupid_ human customs! He plucked a small white daisy from the ground and crushed it in his hand. He _had_ to find out! It could be information crucial to his mission. But to ask would be to show weakness; to display his poor knowledge of human culture. How to find out without asking. . . ?

Of course! Simply perform the said ritual on another unfortunate human! But who would be the unlucky victim. . . ?

It was then that Zim caught sight of Dib, standing by the stairs. He seemed to be avidly describing something to his sister-beast, complete with exaggerated gestures. His sister, on the other hand, was obviously more interested in her gaming device than Dib's rambling.

_Perfect._

Zim rose from the ground and rushed towards the steps, all too eager to find out the cause of the strange lip-smashing ritual. He wasted no time as he arrived, taking firm hold of Dib's wrist and swiftly spinning him around. Dib hardly had time to shout out a muffled "Zim!" before their lips met.

_What. The. Hell._ Those were the first three words to fly into Dib's big head. _Zim. . . Zim is kissing me. Zim is __**kissing**__ me! What. . . why. . . how. . .– huh? _No matter how Dib thought of it, it just didn't add up. Why was Zim _kissing him_? But no matter how much he wanted to deny it, excitement was building up inside of him, causing his heart to race, and face to turn red. And soon a question began to linger in his head, lasting longer and longer until it burned.

_Do. . . Do I __**want**__ this?_

Zim pressed his lips harder against Dib's, taking in their texture and the way they stood stiff in shock. The more they stayed like this, Dib and Zim, the less Zim found himself hating Dib. It was as if, rather than sucking out his soul, Dib was sucking out the hatred instead. Zim leaned in closer as he felt his face grow warm.

Gaz almost dropped her Game Slave in the initial shock. She quickly regained her posture, however, gripping her handheld tightly. This was. . . an interesting development. Not that she was all _that_ surprised. With all the time her brother spent blabbering on and on about Zim, it was bound to happen eventually. She just hadn't expected _Zim_ to initiate it.

Finally, Dib came to his senses as he hurriedly pushed Zim away, gasping for air. "Zim. . . What the hell was _that_?"

Zim blinked, eyes wide as he stared Dib down. "You tell me, human."

Dib held his hands out in shock as he cried out, "A kiss, Zim! You just _kissed me_!"

"Did I?"

Dib's face went deadpan. "You did."

"Ah. Yes. Yes I did." Zim held a fist up in the air. "You should feel honored to have the kiss of _Zim!_"

Dib was beginning to lose his patience. "_Honored?_ Zim, do you even know what a kiss _means_?"

Zim smiled brightly. "Of course I do! A kiss means. . ." The smile faded. "Er, a kiss means. . ." He looked at the ground as he shuffled one foot back and forth. "Ehm. . ."

Dib slapped a hand over his face in exasperation. "You have no idea. . . right?"

Zim looked up from his foot, glaring intensely at the human. "Tell Zim."

"What?"

"Tell Zim what a kiss means. _Now._"

"Why should I?" Dib said defiantly, crossing his arms.

"If you do not wish to be destroyed, to will tell Zim what a kiss is used for." He clenched his fists, his eyes narrowing dangerously. "Do you understand?"

Dib sighed, rolling his eyes. "_Fine._ A kiss. . . a-a kiss is how humans show affection, or. . . more like. . . _love._"

_Love. Love. Love._ You could almost hear the word echoing in Zim's head. Love? No. . . no way. The only thing he had ever loved was a cold, unfeeling metal arm. Not the Tallests. Not GIR. No one, nothing. But now. . . he had almost told Dib that he _loved_ him. He didn't love Dib. . . he. . . he _hated_ Dib! He hated Dib more than anything, more than anyone!

But there was a feeling slowly developing inside of him, warm and fuzzy and nerve-inducing. It was like he could still feel Dib's lips pressed against his, and it made his face grow uncomfortably hot. What. . . what was happening to him? Why was he shaking? Why couldn't he think straight? What. . . what was this feeling?

"D-_Diiib_. . . ," was all he could manage, and still it came out shaky and mumbled. He raised his hands to his face, placing them on his cheeks. He could feel the warmth even through his gloves.

"Zim?" said Dib, stepping closer, his arm stretching out to reach Zim. "Your face. . . it's _blue_." His eyes sparkled. "Is this some sort of strange alien fever? Oh, I gotta get pictures!" He turned around, bending over to reach for his backpack, which was resting on one of the steps. But he never even touched it, since in a mere moment Zim had thrown himself on top of Dib, flinging his arms around his neck as he pressed his lips against Dib's again.

What was _wrong_ with Zim?

Gaz was hardly surprised this time, and was even _less_ surprised when Dib's expression softening, and he began to kiss Zim back. "Get a room," she muttered indignantly.

The kiss was quickly broken as Dib abruptly shoved Zim away, face turning bright red. "G-_Gaz_!"


	6. Silver Linings: ZaDR

**Title- Silver Linings**

**Genre- Humor; Romance**

**Summary- Their klassmates had the right kind of eyes. ZaDr. Contains a few select OCs. **

**Words- 1, 346**

**Inspiration- I was outside, and then. . . I thought of this, and immediately I wanted to write it.**

**Notes-** **This one takes place in sixth grade,** **exactly a year after Zim's arrival on Earth.** **Two OCs in this one. . .** **Val and Crem, who are primary characters in my story **_**New Reactions**_**. Let me briefly explain them.**

**Val, in fifth grade, was the new kid in the other fifth grade klass. She met Dib one day and instantly came up with the crazy idea that Zim and Dib were just meant to be. She kinda seems to linger on the edge of her sanity.**

**Crem is an Irken invader who, because she's terrible with ships, ended up crashing on Earth. Zim has now taken her under his wing, and she poses as his sister in a disguise just as terrible as Zim's. She also has not-so-great grammar.**

Zim and Dib had started out as enemies. That much was simple. The fighting, the shouting, the hitting, the insults, the names. Their relationship was simple– Dib tried to prove Zim was an alien, Zim fought back, hating him more and more with each passing moment. After a few months, the fighting and hitting and name calling grew mundane; it became a "here we go again" sort of operation.

Nobody quite knew when things started to change, though most kids estimated it was around the time when Dib gave up on capturing Zim for about a week. That whole week Zim was absent from skool. When he returned, things were different. Their glares ended with smiles; their fights turned into normal conversations; there was more teasing than insulting. Heck, even the name "Dib-Stink" hasd been dropped, and replaced with "Dib-Thing". That in itself was miraculous.

Now, it had been a year since Zim had arrived, exactly a year. Yes, on September 24, exactly one year ago, Zim entered Ms. Bitter's fifth grade klass. It had been a month into the skool year, and the months following were the most interesting months of each and every student's life.

The question was: _Will Dib remember? _Had Dib, obessive compulsive Dib, memorized the exact date of the little green kid's arrival, and furthermore, had he been waiting for this day?

Every student in the room knew the answer, but still they waited on the edge of their seats for the inevitable _yes_.

After all, it wasn't hard to see the love mixed in with the hate. It was _hatehatelovehatehate_ with those two– the love was there, and it wasn't that hard to see, it was just disguised by all the hate. It was like a "spot the difference" game. You just had to have the right kind of eyes to see the love wedged in between the hate. Their klassmates had the right kind of eyes.

Most of the skool kids pretended not to notice when Dib walked into the room, more cheery than usual. Of course, they had expected that from Dib. From Zim; no matter how unpredictable he might be; they had expectations, too. But would those expectations be fulfilled?

Yes. Yes, they would.

Zim walked into the klassroom, accompanied by Crem. He wore little emotion on his face– just his usual scowl. He took his seat near the back of the room, while Dib sat only a desk away, just to the right of Zim. It was their seating assignments; besides, Dib and Zim didn't seem to mind. Unfortunately this meant almost every student had to turn around a little to get a good view of the pair. After all, they didn't have eyes in the backs of their heads.

There was still five minutes until klass started. That would be enough time.

"Oh, _Zi-im_," started Dib in a sing-song tone. It was now that the students began conversations, most of them revolving around the ongoing events.

"I've got ten bucks on a present," said Tae.

"Nah," replied Aki from in front of him, hardly taking her eyes off of her book. "It'll probably be a not-so-subtle reminder."

"You think they actually realize they're friends?" whispered Peyoopi.

"I hope so," said Keef, his smile overwhelming.

"They sure are a couple of freaks," commented Jessica.

"Yeah," agreed Zita, "but they're _each other's_ freaks." She smiled slightly as she gazed at them. "I think it's kinda cute."

"_Totally_ cute," chirped Val.

"Pfft, whatever," was all Jessica said.

"Shh-shh-_shh_, he's about to say something!" The Letter M warned. And with that, they all turned their attention towards the back, whispering quietly to one another.

"What is it, Dib-Thing?" Zim replied nonchlantly,

Dib grinned. "What day is today?"

"Subtle reminder, I told you," whispered Aki.

Zim would have raised an eyebrow, if he had one. Instead, one eyes seemed to widen a bit. "Eh. . . September 24th?"

"Clueless. . . ," said Val under her breath. "As usual."

"Zim is not of the knowing variety," Crem replied softly. "He is unknowing in the ways of the humans."

". . . So are you." There was a small smirk on Val's face.

"That of which is true."

". . . That made no sense."

"Did it not?"

Dib sighed, placing a few finger on the bridge of his nose. "No, Zim. Well, I mean, _yes_, but–" He sighed again. "What _is_ September 24th, exactly?"

Zim looked genuinely confused. "Why are you asking Zim this, human? Shouldn't you know yourself what September 24th is?"

"Yes, but I want you to guess."

"Why?"

"Don't ask why, just guess."

"No. Tell me."

"Why should I? Guess."

"Tell me human, or else Zim will do despicable things to your filthy human body!" Snickers escaped a few skoolchildren. Ha. Sexual innuendos. . .

"Why can't you just _guess_?"

Zim leaned in, his face lingering inches away from Dib's. While his glare was feral, a smile had already overtaken his face. "I don't _want_ to. Now tell me. Tell _Zim_. . ."

"It's the day you came to Earth, okay?" Dib cried out, abruptly leaning back in his seat, leaving Zim looking surprised and oddly disappointed. "The day we met!" His face turned red as he mumbled, "Our anniversary. . ."

The whole klass exchanged maniac grins. All except for Gretchen, who was frowning slightly, tears threatening to form in her eyes.

"'Anniversary'?" Zim repeated, tilting his head. "But isn't that for human couples. . . ?"

The color on Dib's face brightened. "T-that's not how I meant it!"

"_Sure_ it's not," Brian commented sarcastically. Luckily Dib was far too focused in Zim to hear him.

"Are you sure it's not, Dib-Thing?"

"Positive!"

"Super positive?"

"Super positive!"

"_Jelly_ positive?"

"_Jelly_ postiti– wait a minute. What does jelly have to do with anything?"

Zim glared at Dib, but he was still smiling. "Zim _likes_ jelly, thank you very much!"

And from there started an argument from which there was no escape. The students quickly switched to "here we go again" mode, not missing a beat as they turned away from the bickering couple and waited for the bell to ring.

Nobody quite knew how it happened. Maybe it had been an accident. Maybe they just got too close to each other, and one thing led to another. Or maybe the sexual tension just became too much and it all crashed and burned. Either way. All they knew is that as soon as the yelling suddenly stopped, Poonchy let out a loud, "Oh. My. _Gosh._"

The next to make a sound was Gretchen, sitting on the other side of Dib and Zim. It was a gasp that quickly transformed into a sob as she stood up and flung herself out of the klassroom. (Nobody really minded, they never liked her anyway.)

Because there, in the back of the klassroom, Dib had– God _knows _why– grabbed Zim and kissed him. Was _still_ kissing him, in fact. And as their klassmates watched in awestruck silence, Zim's eyes fluttered closed and, wrapping his arms around Dib's neck, he kissed Dib back.

Man, the students had expected _something_, but they hadn't expected _this much_! A few of the boys looked slightly disgusted, but for the most part they were just shocked. Keef, however, had a smile brighter than any smile you had ever seen him in before. Aki's book fell to the floor with a _clack_. Crem looked at them wide-eyed in wonder, while Val had to clamp her hands over her motuh to stop herself from squealing. Jessica wrinkled her nose in disgust, her eyes surprisingly wide as she stared at the two.

Zita was the first to speak, standing and slamming her hands on her desk as Dib began to press Zim against the side of his desk, their kiss getting more sensual with each passing second.

"This is awesome."

Jessica looked at her in shock. "Since _when_?"


	7. Story Summaries: Vol 1

**Title- Story Summaries, Vol. 1**

**Summary- Fifteen story summaries. One bored author. A very hard decision. . . . Help, please?**

**Words- 203**

**Inspiration- Assorted.**

**Notes- So this is basically** **my little hide out for all the ideas I've got going on in my head. I have the summaries (like, the one you would see in a FanFiction description) written out, I just hafta decide which ones to write. So. . . you guys tell me which ones you want, and I'll write 'em. Sound good?**

**Oh, and IDEA! I'll just keep the pairings a secret. . . though some of them are really obvious, while others are really only friendship.**

_On the Top of the Steps: _Dib wasn't sure he wanted to be in the holiday spirit. . . especially if it meant kissing Zim.

_Stuck On Replay: _He was infuriating. . . but it was oddly lonely without him.

_In Your Dreams: _Well, he could dream.

_May the Stars Be With You: _Horoscopes can be fun.

_Cookies: _Red needed to learn how to share.

_Dirt and Dust: _He just loved getting himself into trouble.

_Drowning in Wrong: _Gaz never liked Zim much.

_Holding Hearts: _Skoodge and Minimoose talk over sandwiches.

_Too Late: _Dib was going to regret this tomorrow. . . So was Zim.

_Trapped: _Once they get out of there, Zim will destroy every single closet on this filthy planet.

_Ribbons and Lace: _"GIR! We're supposed to be destroying the Earth, _not_ having tea parties!"

_Popcorn: _"But. . . you can't eat human food." "No matter. . . you can share with GIR."

_Blindfolds: _It was all a game. That's all it had ever been. They were just too submerged in it to separate the fantasy from the reality.

_Empty Bottles: _One bottle, three Irkens, two humans, one robot, one moose-thing. What would possibly go wrong? . . . Absolutely everything.

_Kiss: _"Just. . . promise you won't tell Zim."


	8. Trapped: ZaGR

**Title- Trapped**

**Genre- Humor; Romance.**

**Summary- Once they get out of here, Zim will destroy every single closet on this filthy planet. ZaGR. (You heard me right.)**

**Words- 838**

**Inspiration- A story summary I once wrote for a Four Swords fic with the same name. The summary was simply, "Stupid closet."**

**Notes- This was the one with the most votes. . . but you guys all thought it would be ZaDR, didn't cha? TROLLED. But of course I left a ZaDR hint at the end 'cause I just can't help myself. ;)**

**Remember to keep on voting! I hafta decide which one to write next!**

Zim growls. "Get your_ feet_ out of my face."

Gaz growls right back. "As soon as you get your filthy alien hand away from my. . ." Zim can tell without looking that she's glaring. "From my _skull necklace_."

"Just move!"

"I _can't_!"

"Get your smelly human walking things away from _Zim_!"

"I would _love_ to, but I'm stuck!"

Dib was going to pay for this. Why he had thought it was a good idea to shove his worst enemy and little sister in a closet and lock the door, Gaz will never know. But she _does_ know that _Dib_ will never know happiness again if they don't get out of here _now_.

But the door doesn't open; doesn't unlock.

Oh, he will _pay_.

Zim manages to pry himself away from the Dib-sister-beast and bangs his fists on the door repeatedly. "Dib-Stink!" he shrieks as the top of his lungs. "Zim will destroy you!"

He's so loud that Gaz has to cover her ears to keep from going deaf, and once he's done, she hits him sharply upside the head. "Shut up before I have to rip your vocal chords out."

Zim's eyes narrow at her, and he raises a hand up to rub his head while shouting out, "How dare you hit the head of Zim? How _dare_ you?"

Gaz hardly bats an eye. "Easy. I just _did_."

Zim clenches his fists. How can she be so blunt? She is defying Zim. Zim! And nobody, _nobody_ defies Zim. _No one!_ (Except for Dib of course, but that Zim can tolerate.) But this _girl_, this filthy human dirt girl, she thinks she can just push Zim around and get away with it? Well she is sadly, sadly mistaken!

But despite the rage Zim is feeling, something else is growing there. The Gaz human. . . she's different, like Dib. But she's a whole different brand of different. A different that confuses Zim; intrigues him, even. No one ever dared to defy Zim. . . she's the exception. And that makes her appear surprisingly _smart_ in Zim's eyes. And while she knows that Zim's an alien, she just. . . doesn't care. She's smart, like her brother; but sane, like the others.

And no, he's not developing human-like feelings for the filthy Earth girl. He just. . . doesn't hate her quite as much as the others. Yes. That's it. That is all.

. . .

The silence has grown to be rather awkward.

. . .

Once they get out of here, Zim will destroy every single closet on this filthy planet. Unfortunately, it doesn't look like Dib _will_ ever let them out of this death trap.

"I'm bored," Gaz says suddenly.

"Don't you have your handheld device to entertain you?"

Gaz frowns, reminding herself to give Dib no mercy. "No. Dib took it. He hid it and after about ten minutes, told me it was in here."

If Zim had eyebrows, he would be raising one. "And you believed him?"

"I was getting desperate!" She crosses her arms and looks to the side. "Man, for an alien menace, you're pretty annoying."

Zim flails his arms about as he shouts, "What do you mean Zim is annoying! He is _normal_!" Unfortunately the cursed closet is too small for Zim's flailing, and he ends up bumping into a wall and toppling over. Of course, _because_ this Tallest-damned closet is so tiny, he ends up toppling on top of Gaz. And _because_ the universe hates Zim so much, he ends up locking lips with the filthy creature.

And _because_ it couldn't get any worse, it's at this very moment that Dib decides to open the door. His face would be priceless if Zim wasn't kissing an Earth-Stink.

Gaz pushes Zim off so forcefully that he ends up hitting his head on the wall. She stands and storms out of the hell hole, shoving Dib to the ground as she passes by him.

Dib slowly stands and brushes himself off. What the hell? Why. . . why had Zim been kissing Gaz? And on that note, had they been kissing before Dib arrived? The very thought of it makes him sick. He feels his stomach take a swan dive as Zim brushes by him. His shoulder tingles. Zim. . . Zim should be destroying him. Zim wasn't one to back down from destroying. So what was the big deal?

Dib knows what the big deal is, and he tries not to believe it, but he does. Zim is in a good mood. He _likes_ Gaz. He really does. And Gaz. . . Dib thought he would be _dead_ after the stunt he pulled. . . but he's surprisingly alive. So she must be in a good mood, too. . . not that she'd ever admit it.

Dib stares after Zim and frowns. _Screw it. If Zim's happy, I'm happy._

_Unless he's destroying all the closets on Earth. . . . Dammit._


	9. Drowning in Wrong: SURPRISE PAIRING

**Title- Drowning in Wrong**

**Genre- Romance; Angst**

**Summary- Gaz never liked Zim much. SURPRISE PAIRING!**

**Words- 849**

**Inspiration- A picture in my new "how-to-draw manga romance" book.**

**Notes- Still not telling! ;) Wanted to do an interesting take on Gaz in this one. I do something kinda weird in this one, see if you can figure it out.**

It's started again.

"Dib-Stink!"

"Space Boy!"

"Worm baby!"

"Alien scum!"

"You have a big head!"

"_It's not big!_"

They're fighting. At **L**east, that's what it sounds like. Really, they're not fighting at all. Well, maybe they are. Gaz can't really tell with those two. But they're smiling. Her brother never smiles around Zim. Or at least, that's how it used t**O** be. . .

She's sitting alone for once. Dib used to sit with her in the cafeteria. But today he's with Zim, and they're laughing and talking and _blushing_. It makes Gaz feel absolutely sick.

No one would ha**V**e noticed that her Game Slave is closed and sitting next to her on the table. Or more like, Dib doesn't notice. And he's everyon**E** to Gaz. But no, all Dib cares about is _Zim Zim Zim_. No one else matters. Not even Gaz.

No one.

Gaz remembers how **I**t used to be. If there was one person who was more important than Zim, it was Gaz. He had spent days on end trying to figure out a cure when he had cursed her with those horrible pig powers. He had even tried to get Zim to help him. Back then, that wa**S** a big deal. But now, would he have even cared?

Dib. Her brother is stub**B**orn, desperate, determined, obsessive compulsive, crazy, a genius, generous, frustrating, clueless, and a total idiot. And through it all he is perfect. Absolutely perfect. And the more Gaz acknowledges this, the more it drives her crazy. Dib is _perfect_.

Gaz. She is violent, aggressive, leve**L**-headed, dangerous, cool, spiteful, dark, uncaring, mysterious, and emotionless. She is also perfect, but only because she tries. She started off like this, and she's going to end like th**I**s. To Show emotion would be a flaw; would be to prove she's not perfect.

She can't let that happen. Because being perfect is the only way to wi**N** him back.

Gaz never like**D** Zim much. He's a nuisance, only getting in the way of what she wants– pizza, video games, time with Dad, _Dib_. And it infuria**T**es her, because deep down she knows that Zim stole Dib. And for once, she doesn't mean literally. Zim takes away everything she wants the most, and s**H**e hates him for it.

Gaz hates Dib, too. At least, that's what she wants you to think. She doesn't hate Dib anymore, but he's just so frustratingly clueless that it looks like she does. But, then **A**gain. . . he _does_ hate Dib for being clueless. . . the only problem is that she loves him for everything else.

She knows it's wrong. Frankly, she couldn't care less. After all, Dib is perfect– who wouldn't love him? That was rhetorical. Gaz knows it's wrong and maybe **T**hat's why she likes it so much– it's exciting.

She frown**S**. They seem like such good friends, but Gaz isn't blind. She knows they're more. It's obvious. The way they look at each other and quickly look a**W**ay, smiling and blushing like idiots. Because they really _are_ idiots, and she hates them both.

Well. . . she **H**ates Zim, at the very least. Dib is a mixed bag.

Her stomach churns as she watches them "argue". An insult, a glance, a smile, a blush; rinse, repeat. It's driving her craz**Y**, because the sexual tension is just _lingering there_ and taunting her.

What she wouldn't give to be in his place. The very thought scares her. But fear is emotion and emotion is weakness. . . . Besides, it was more like disgust.

_Insult, glance, smile, blush. _Her skin tingles. She places her hand firml**Y** on the table and stands. Neither boy notices as she makes her way over to them. They only n**O**tice when she says, lo**U**dly, "Hey."

Both boys look her way, Dib curiously; Zim irritated. "You've been 'fighting' for twenty minutes straight," she says bitterly. "I wanna go home." Why they have to fight in the **C**afeteria _after_ school, Gaz c**A**n hardly remember.

Dib frow**N**s and says, "_Gaz_, it hasn't been that long."

"Yes, Dib. Yes, it has."

"Really?" He looks towards the clock, clueless. Realizing just what **T**ime it is, he stands up, looking at his sister warily. "Oh. Well, can we **S**tay just a little longer? I still want to ask _Zim_–"

"–You had your chance." In what seems like a split second, Gaz has grabbed Dib by the collar, glaring int**E**nsely at him. "And you blew it." She lowers her grip to Dib's hand and begins dragging him out of the room. Yeah, the urge had been there– to give into wrong desires, to pull him just a little closer, for lips to meet lips, to shatter her r**E**putation with a big bang. But she knows what that would have done.

"B-but, _Gaz_–"

"–Welcome to **M**y world, Dib."

"Huh?" Those glasses don't help him see a thing.

Zim is surprisingly silent as they leave th**E** room.

**AN- Usually I don't leave these at the end, but this time it's kinda neccassary.**

**So. . . I know what you're thinking. DaGR? Yep! DaGR falls under the category "if they weren't siblings, I would ship this hardcore." I know this didn't get any votes, but I had some of it planned out already and just **_**had**_** to write it.**

**Okay, so there are still thirteen stories that haven't been written. Please vote which ones you would like to see. (Forget about your old votes, we're starting fresh.) As a reminder, they are–**

_On the Top of the Steps, Stuck on Replay, In your Dreams, May the Stars Be With You, Cookies, Dirt and Dust, Holding Hearts, Too Late, Ribbons and Lace, Popcorn, Blindfolds, Empty Bottles, _and _Kiss._

**Please vote! The one with the most votes will be the next one written! See ya soon! ;D**


	10. Excitable: RaPR

**Title- Excitable**

**Genre- Romance;Humor**

**Summary- Sometimes, Red just couldn't help himself. RaPR.**

**Words- 569**

**Inspiration- I'm in a snacky mood. Therefore, you get some RaPR.**

**Notes- Have I ever mentioned how much I _love_ the Tallests? Well, I do. They're my favorite characters in the show by far. (Not that I don't love everyone else, of course!)**

**Really, this is more of a drabble than anything, but it fits in here, so why the hell not?**

**As a final note, I've come up with some genius real names for the Tallests! (Because I'm thinking the Tallests get to choose new, cooler names for themselves when they become Tallests.) Scar and Vi! Like, you know. . . Scarlet and Violet? Except it's just Scar and Vi. They only call each other this in dialogue; I, as the narrator, still refer to them as Red and Purple. Just because I don't think their Tallest names are ever really spoken on screen. . . Are they? If anyone knows of a moment when they were, tell me!**

**But anyways, in my headcanon, when they were younger they were best buddies and their dream was to be the Tallests together. Red came up with their Tallest names a long time ago.**

**Also, thought I might mention I'm working on _Too Late_. It's turning out pretty well!**

If there's one word to describe Purple, it's excitable. Just the smallest amount of good news makes him happy. New snacks? He rushes to the snack table in a frenzy. Red follows him, smiling and sometimes shaking his head. Puppets? Purple claps and cheers at the top of his lungs. Zim died? Well, he hasn't– not yet– but Red can only imagine how Purple would react.

Today in particular is a rather excitement-inducing day. Not only do they have a new batch of snacks, and a big one at that; but during Zim's last transmission, his idiotic SIR unit has broken his camera. That will definitely stop transmissions for a while.

Purple is busy stuffing donuts into his mouth with lightning speed. Yep, he's definitely in a good mood. He's getting donut crumbs everywhere! No matter, someone will take care of that. But it's pretty funny to watch Purple stuff his mouth to the fullest captivity like that. Not that Red isn't eating any donuts– he won't let Purple eat all of them, of course! Speaking of which. . .

He smacks Purple upside the head as hard as he can.

"Ouch!" Purple cries out, rubbing his head. Donut crumbs fly everywhere. He swallows and frowns at Red. "What was _that_ for?"

Red smiles to himself. "One– you're eating all the donuts; Two– it's been a while since I last abused you."

Purple's frown grows. "I don't _like it_ when you abuse me."

"Tough luck. I'm the Tallest, I get whatever I want."

Purple's eyes narrow at him. "You're not the only Tallest!"

Red smirks. "I would've been. I was always a couple of inches taller than you, until you had that growth spurt–"

"That's not true!" Red snickers. It isn't really true, but he just loves teasing Purple. That look on his face is just _too_ cute. . .

"Whatever," Red says before reaching forward and snatching a donut out of Purple's hand.

"Hey! Scar, that's _my_ donut!"

Red's smirk grows. "Tallest, remember? I get whatever I want."

Purple pouts, glaring at Red. "So that means _I_ should get whatever _I_ want, too!"

Red pretends to ponder this for a second. "Hmm. . . Nah!" He stuffs the donut into his mouth, chews, and swallows. The look on Purple's face is priceless, and not to mention _adorable_.

But the look fades, and Purple pouts again, turning away from Red and crossing his arms angrily. Red just shrugs and takes another donut. Damn, Purple is cute even when he's _angry_. And as Red steals another glance at him, he doesn't feel hungry for donuts anymore. . .

He remembers last week, when Zim had sent them a transmission on human affection. . . it had been stupid, and the information was more than just useless, but it had made Red curious. . .

He reaches out and grabs one of Purple's thin arms, spinning him around. Purple makes a brief sound of objection, but it's cut short but Red leaning forward and pressing his lips against Purple's. It last for a short while until Red breaks it, smirking deviously as he takes note of Purple's expression– wide eyes, mouth slightly agape, and cheeks turning bright blue.

"Sorry, Vi– sometimes I just can't help myself." Red walks away, feeling rather satisfied.


	11. Glances: ZaDR

**Title- Glances**

**Genre- Romance; Humor**

**Summary- I will not look at Zim. I will not look at Zim. I will not look at Zim. I will not look at Zim. Dib's POV, ZaDR.**

**Words- 1,296**

**Inspiration- InsomniaticFrenchToast wanted a story with more details on "Zim Buys Booty Shorts". Specifically Dib's**** struggle to not look at Zim, and how exactly Gaz found out. . . . Yes, it took me this long. XD**

**Notes- Let me issue a warning. . . this is a little racier than most of my stories. It's not that bad, there's just some, er. . . sexual refrences. XD**

I grip the edge of the table.

I will not look at Zim.

I bite my lip.

I will not look at Zim.

I try to focus on something else—my cafeteria food.

I _will not_ look at Zim.

. . . I look at Zim. Dammit!

It's the shorts, dammit. It's all because of those stupid, stupid shorts, I swear. They're small and black and short. Very, very _short_. Only _girls_ wear shorts that short! Zim's not a girl! So why in the name of _Bigfoot_ is Zim wearing shorts that short to skool? Huh? Huh? _Why?_

I stare at my food, picking at it with my fork. It's not my fault, really. It's not like this has ever happened before. . . so why now?

I'm telling you, it's because of those dumb shorts.

I steal another glance. Crap!

The shorts fit tightly around his figure, making him look. . . almost _girlish_. His hips look a little softer, and they show off his nice, long legs. . . What the hell am I _thinking_?

No. I can't look at Zim. I just can't. Because if I do. . .

I glance at Gaz this time. She's glaring at me intensely. Figures. She'll do anything to get her hands on those pizzas. . . not that I actually _have_ any pizzas yet. But it's not the pizzas I'm worried about. No, it's the whole "holding over my head forever" part that I'm dreading. That, and having to admit to being in love with some stupid green alien.

. . . Did I just think that? _ARGH._

No. _No._ It's totally not what you're thinking. I do _not_ have a crush on Zim. No way. And it's definitely not a burning, raging crush, either. And I most certainly do _not_ fantasize about running my hands down that sexy green body and—. . .

Dammit.

I clench my plastic fork in hopes of calming myself. Nope, doesn't work; my nerves are still on their very end. I focus every spare inch of my brain on _not staring at Zim._

. . .

I glance at Zim. I. Hate. My. Life. He's just so. . . so _tantalizing_! No matter _what_ I do, I just can't take my eyes off of him!

Stupid shorts with their stupid shortness.

"Dib?" I twitch, quickly turning myself to face Gaz. The usual scowl is etched on her face, but she has one eye open in what appears to be deep thought.

"Yeah?" I say slowly, dreading whatever she's about to say.

"It's Zim, isn't it?"

I freeze, feeling my stomach take a swan dive. My heart begins to race. How did she know? I must have been staring at him too much! Dammit, dammit, dammit. "What gave you that idea?"

"You've been staring at him non-stop for the past two minutes."

_Dammit._ I groan and hit my head on the edge of the table, feeling my face grow hot.

"I'm right, aren't I?"

"Yes. . . ," I mumble feebly.

Gaz just smirks in triumph and turns back to her Game Slave.

"Please don't tell anyone, Gaz. . ."

"Fine, whatever. As long as I get my pizzas. . ."

I turn my head, still resting on the table, slightly to give me a better view of Zim. Why. . . ?

"You know Dib, you could just tell him."

Tell him? Tell him? "_Tell him? _He'll _destroy _me!" In an instant, half of the cafeteria is looking our way. Including Zim. I tense, ducking my head down in embarrassment.

"It was just a suggestion," Gaz says with the slightest shrug. Suddenly everyone in the cafeteria is going about their own business once more. My sister. . . so uncaring that she makes others around her stop caring.

The bell rings, and Gaz rises, hardly taking her squinted eyes off of her Game Slave. "Dib," she says, "you get me those pizzas by _Wednesday_, got it?"

"Y-yes," I manage to mumble in my strong state of embarrassment, knowing she's being surprisingly generous with her demand. I rise from my seat, grab my bag, and begin my walk down the hallwa—

"_Stink-human!_"

I jump and almost shriek. I turn around quickly, already well aware of who it is. Who _else_ would call me "stink-human"? No one but Zim. I look down at him and frown—he's a full four inches shorter than me now that we're in middle skool. "What do you want?"

Zim narrows his eyes at me, tilting his head to one side. "Why were you staring at Zim?"

I feel my stomach dip again. "Staring? I wasn't staring at you!"

"In the cafeteria?" Zim reminds me, scowling.

My cheeks turn red. "Oh, yeah. . . _that._"

Zim nods briskly. "Yes, yes—_that_. Now tell me, human—why were you staring at Zim?"

I glare hard at Zim, throwing my hands up in defense. _Don't look at the shorts. . ._ "What? You're acting like I've never been caught staring at you before!" I've stared at Zim from across the cafeteria plenty of times before, but never like _that_.

Unfortunately, Zim knows just as much as I do. Well. . . sort of. "Well, _yes_, but never like you did today!" Before I can respond, Zim continues. "You were staring at Zim with those. . . with those _googley_ eyes," he muses. "And your _face_! It was red, as if you were coming down with some _horrible_ human disease!" My face flushes, and this time Zim takes notice. "_See?_ There's the redness again!"

"Shut up, Zim," I mutter, trying to look anywhere _but _the shorts.

_Don't look, dontlook, dontlookdontlook. . .!_

I look.

God damn!

_Now_ I can't take my eyes off of them. Soon I find myself tracing the shape of his hips, and before I know it I'm undressing him with my eyes, dreaming of what I could do to that body if given the chance. I hardly hear Zim talking—something about telling him something, and how he would be the only one to do any destroying around here. No, I'm far too busy letting my eyes—and my mind—wander perversely.

I do hear, however, when he says, "My eyes are up_ here_, Dib."

Instantly I feel my face burn. I quickly look up to meet his gaze; cold, hard, and irritated. But there's something behind the rough exterior, and by God I needed to find out what it was.

At this point the crowds have dispersed, and we've been left alone in the hallway. It doesn't matter—all we've ever needed was each other. He makes me feel _alive_, that hot-headed, egotistic, green-skinned jerk; and I absolutely _love _it. Something in my writing has gone screwy, so I hardly think before grabbing him by the shoulders and slamming him against the lockers. He squirms and objects, thinking I'm trying to start a fight.

Of course, the possibility of that is thrown out the window as soon as I messily force our lips together. It's my first kiss, and probably his, too. It's filled with frustration and tension and _need_. He relaxes into it, but squirms a bit as a run one hand up his bare leg, tugging slightly at dark denim.

Reality finally kicks in as the bell rings, echoing in my ears. I abruptly break the kiss, jumping away almost immediately. "Oh God. . . ," I gasp, "I-I'm late!" I turn away, dashing off before Zim can say anything.

I look back at him in my rush, and it's now that I realize his eyes could bore a hole in my head he's staring at me so hard. I turn back ahead, resisting the urge to shut my eyes tightly.

_Dammit._

**AN- _MAY I PLEASE DIRECT YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS TEXT._ Thank you. Sorry about that, but it seems some people just don't like to read these things. . . Now, there's something I need all of you to do. A few things, actually. First, open another tab. Go to YouTube. . . now type in "webkinzfungirl101". Click on the channel. . . ta-da! You're at my YouTube channel! I have three IZ videos currently, two of them being ZaDR. More are sure to come. Now, if any of you edit with Invader Zim, like I do, please let me know! Because I'd really, really love to host an IZ Crack Pairings MEP, but I need to find out who would join. So. . . you could click that subscribe button. . . SHAMELESS SELF-PROMOTION.**

**On the other hand, did any of you guys know about my new ZaDR fanfiction "List of Dread"? Well, it's not all that new! Better get reading; there's already six chapters! And also, I'm doing the 100 theme challenge. . . in case, you know, you wanted to check that out, too. . . MORE SHAMELESS SELF-PROMOTION.**

**So, yes; please let me know if you would participate in that MEP. PM me, review, comment on one of my videos, whatever. Thank you all so much for putting up with my crap! :D**


	12. Lean: ZaDR

**Title- Lean**

**Genre- Humor; Romance**

**Summary- All it took was a bit of leaning. . . ZaDR.**

**Words- 153**

**Inspiration- A few other stories that were like this one.**

**Notes- I've always wanted to write one of these. . .**

**BAM! Updates in your face!**

"Okay, fine! Just. . . promise we'll never speak of this again!"

"Why not?"

"_Because_, Zim! It's. . . weird. It's not something I've ever thought of letting you do."

"Well, you should feel honored! Zim would not ask this of just _any_ human!"

"I've got it, Zim! Alright. . . let's just get this over with. . ."

"How should Zim. . . go about starting?"

"You just. . . lean in."

"Like this?"

"Yeah, like that. Now just—"

"Lean in, Earth Dirt."

"Huh?"

"Zim cannot reach."

"Oh. . . right. Sorry."

". . ."

". . ."

". . . Bleh! Your flavor tastes funny!"

"It does _not_ taste funny! Besides, you have to use your tongue to taste it!"

"Should Zim try again?"

"If you want, I guess. . ."

". . ."

". . ."

"Tastes like. . . chocolate."

"It's supposed to, Zim."

"Why?"

"It's chocolate ice-cream!"


	13. Fate of the World

**Title- Fate of the World**

**Genre- Angst**

**Summary- Dib wonders what it would be like to give up.**

**Words- 341**

**Inspiration- An image I've had in my head for quite a while. Also, the wanting to do Dib angst RIGHT.**

**Notes- Okay, here's a challenge for you artists out there. Draw this for me, and I will love you forever: Dib is sitting on the floor, in his room, surrounded by voo-doo dolls of his klassmates. They all have button eyes, and their mouths are stitched up with red thread. He's busy sewing the mouth closed on one last one. The Zim doll sits to the side, a little heart sewn onto its chest. His mouth is not sewn up. A Dib doll is nearby, as well, with a little heart sewn onto his chest. A pin is stuck into it.**

**(For the record, I can't EVER imagine Dib cutting himself, or committing suicide. He's more likely to go insane, or snap at his peers. It's supposed to be symbolic of a broken heart.)**

Sometimes Dib wondered why he still bothered. No one heard him; no one saw the light. They were all deaf; blind; and that made him a mute; invisible. Dib was a crazy nuisance, and they were all too stubborn to see otherwise.

They would laugh at Dib; insist that he was a freak; and Dib would sit there, absorbing the words as if they weren't acid. As if they didn't burn. He would just frown, roll his eyes, and take it.

They would never accept the fact that Dib was right. They had too much pride. Undeniable evidence could be shoved in their faces, and still they would accept Zim's ridiculous excuse, just to prove their superiority over Dib. And then they would call him "crazy," just to extenuate that superiority; just to make Dib feel worthless.

Sometimes Dib wondered if they were _worth_ saving; wondered, that if, once the time came, he would abandon them—make _them_ feel worthless. Maybe the Armada would come and the problem would sort itself out. At that point he could just turn to Zim; talk him into taking Dib with him.

Well, he had always wanted to see the galaxy. . .

Why did he put up with it? The laughing, the name calling, the insults. Why hadn't he snapped; given them a piece of his mind? Inside, he was screaming.

_Stop! Stop talking! Shut up! Don't tell me what I already know. I'm __**crazy**__! What do I care?! I don't care! Just don't say a word. Shut up. __**Shut up!**__ Stop laughing! It's not funny! This is serious! You don't understand. . ._

_**You don't understand.**_

Sometimes, Dib wondered if any of them would really care if the Earth were destroyed.

But of course, he would never let Earth's fate slip between his fingers like that. He was determined. He had a planet to save. Zim was his enemy, and he wasn't about to let him win just because some kids told him he was insane.

Sometimes, though, he couldn't help but wonder.


	14. Secrets and Lies: ZaDR

**Title- Secrets and Lies**

**Genre- Romance**

**Summary- Zita has finally crossed the line. Strongly implied ZaDR.**

**Words- 418**

**Inspiration- The song "Who Likes Who?" by Jordan Pruitt.**

**Notes- This is definitely my favorite one. And I mean out of ALL of my one-shots.**

**I really like Zita, but Sara's my favorite skool kid, just because she's voiced by Janice Kawaye.**

To Zita, almost nothing takes importance over gossip. The question, "who like who?" has become the exact subject of her obsession. Whispers fill the hallways, spreading rumors, lies, and often even the truth. Every student has a rumor attached to them. To have no rumor, you would have to be invisible. No one is safe.

_No one._

"Jessica likes Poonchy!" Zita screeches into her lavender-cased cell phone. She's the last girl in the locker room, fixing her makeup after cheer practice. Holding out a tube of lip gloss, she slathers on one last coat of _Pizza Delight_.

"Really?!" comes Sara's voice from the other end of the line. "I was just talking to Poonchy, and he said he likes Mary."

"No way!" says Zita, stuffing her makeup into a small, striped bag. Dropping it into her cheer bag, she listens to Sara's voice take over the other end of the line.

"I _know_! I didn't tell him Mary likes Tae."

Zita grins, slinging her cheer bag over one shoulder. "But Tae's dating Peyoopi," she says, as if reciting a quote from a movie.

"I heard she's just doing that to make Brian jealous."

Zita makes her way out of the locker room, shutting the door behind her. She walks along the side of the football field, clutching her phone to her ear. She's always the most animated during a call. "Yeah, but Aki and Brian were making out in the band room last Tuesday."

"Aki told us she likes Keef, too—remember?"

Zita continues walking, making her way towards the bleachers. "Yeah. . . he _is_ kinda cute, but he's her game, so I won't budge. Girl code, you know?"

Zita imagines Sara nodding as she says, "Well, _duh_. But I think he likes Gretchen. . . _ekk_."

"Well, we _all know_ she likes Dib. . . the freak."

"You know," says Sara, "I think Dib might like _you_."

Zita is about to gag—rather loudly—when she passes by the bleachers.

What she sees makes her drop her phone in shock.

Dib and Zim, under the bleachers. Locked lips and shattered lies. Clutching clothing and keeping secrets. Angry holding and spiteful pinning. Zita has never felt so embarrassed.

She bends over, shakily taking her phone, before stumbling away from the shining silver that was locking away so many secrets. The words, "Zita? . . . _Zita!_" snap her out of her trance.

She holds the phone up to her ear—gingerly, cautiously.

"I'll call you back."

_Click._

**AN- I should probably say. . .**

**Webkinfungirl101- my YouTube. I post IZ videos.**

**ask-zimanddib . tumblr . com- an ask Zim and Dib tumblr. Eventual ZaDR.**


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